An astonishment a day- 
drives your depression away...

The transport of alcohol. 

The transporting of alcohol has always had its difficulties and is often quite risky. The problem gets even more complicated when the alcohol needs to be taken into a prison, where along the way there are various controls and persecutions. An ingenious method of transportation is described by a Russian prisoner, who was familiar with the Siberian camps of the 1950's through her own experiences. 

The prisoners working outside of the camps had the opportunities to come across alcohol through others, but the main problem was regarding their friends who were not allowed outside of the camps. The following method was devised for this very reason, and is both ingenious and almost foolproof. The person chosen as the 'transporter' swallowed a condom attached to a rubber hose. After the condom was swallowed the end of tube needed to be held between the teeth, so that it would not drop into the stomach. Next, alcohol was pumped into the condom. Through experience it was discovered that the volume of the 'live container' was approximately three liters. After the 'transporter' returned into the prison, his delighted friends would hang him by his feet, place a bowl below his head, and release every last drop of alcohol, like bleeding a pig. At first this would seem as a complicated and unkind procedure for the 'transporter'. But this was easily outweighed by the fun in getting the whole barracks drunk and forgetting about the miserable reality for the time being. 
There is of course some risk associated with this. It is well known that condoms do break. Normally this would mean the beginning of a life, however in this case it is the definite end of one. No drunkard could withstand the sudden appearance of three litres of spirits in his stomach. But even this was a better outcome, taking into consideration the alternatives such as death from exhaustion or torture.

I don't have any illustration of the described procedure, however myrmecologists know of similar method used by certain species of ants. They discovered this many millions of years ago, which was of great benefit to their colony. Some members function as live cisterns filled with water or aphid excretions, they hang from the ceiling and service their needy companions. However they do this hanging normally, with their heads up and pass the fluids from mouth to mouth. This seems like a much more sophisticated and humane procedure.




(C) (selected from publications of 
 R. Antoszewski

Titirangi, Auckland, 
New Zeland

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February  2003